A World of Their Own

Technology provides new ways to communicate through networks and online circuits as well as other means of social media. It has opened the doors for so many who struggle with socializing. We have started to take a look at how isolating this technology can possibly be, but the antisocial creature within me is thinking quite the opposite. Online environments especially provide an outlet for individuals to socialize. For those who have always been more kept to themselves or had trouble communicating face to face, a whole new world has been created. In it, the anti socialites finally have a place to call their own.

The web and other new technologies are not going to be the death of socialization. Yes, we do need to adjust and learn how to fit this all into our lives. The following video gives a great example of how at first, there is a lot to social media. However, we simply need to work through the details and apply it to our lives as it will work for us. Like the pickle ice cream lovers you’ll hear about in this video, not everyone is going to find the social network they need in the web. They will instead need to have more ties to “real” communities and converse face to face. Others though will blossom in online communities and find interests as well as individuals that are vital to their social being.



As we dive into Michael Bugeja’s Interpersonal Divide, part of me thinks I’d make a good case study for Bugeja. Beware though, as I think I would prove to the contrary of what Bugeja theorizes. I grew up in a world that was basically free of technology or “social media,” feasting instead on books and long phone conversations with friends. For almost all of my childhood years, the most advanced I ever got in regards to technology was a Sony CD player. Yes, the very early version that would skip at the slightest bump. You didn’t dare think of listening to a CD in the car on that thing. So with not a lot of technology and certainly no exposure to an online world, I turned out to be one of the most anti-social people you’ll probably ever know.

I know what you are thinking – really? Well, I do a good job of hiding it but honestly, socializing in a “real” social environment drains the heck out of me. I can’t stand it. So, Mr. Bugeja, what happened to me? Did reading books isolate me so much that I prefer staying at home and curling up with a good book? Maybe.

But the real truth here is that contrary to what Mr. Bugeja may theorize, social media, especially the web itself, has helped me to become more social. Years ago I wouldn’t have even thought about going to the mall and I especially hated going to class with all those people! And then I got online. I love the online world because for once I can communicate in an environment I feel more comfortable as well as in a way (writing) I want to with others. I have more friends now than ever and while I haven’t exactly “met” them all, I wouldn’t miss the opportunity to do so if I had to chance to meet them in person. I think the best part of being online is that I can be there for people whenever even if distance separates us or our busy lives are out of hand and our schedules don’t allow us to meet up. Now, it is easy to meet up online or send a few encouraging words by email or IM. This is an environment that works for me. I guess you could say its my flavor of ice cream which I actually think is going to sell pretty well.

Democracy 2.0

The political world is drastically changing, likely for the better, and I am not simply referring to the current President Elect Barack Obama. How the current election was run through the various mediums out there allowed for it to be one of the biggest elections in regards to coverage and campaigning that there has ever been. While we had seen technology entering the political world in the Presidential race four years ago by Howard Dean’s Blog for America, it made a splash and Obama’s run for White House a success in 2008. Not only did Obama raise more money than any other candidate in private fundraising for his campaign, but he also reached out to the younger voters, both of which were made possible by the Internet. The campaign of 2008 put its stamp of presence permanently on the World Wide Web, and the Web will bring life and interest back to politics in the US with the help of a younger generation’s interest.

Obama’s run for the White House set the standards for all the future campaigns in how the Internet and other technologies in the 21st century can make for success. Perhaps his first best choice was to immediately launch a fully functioning website simultaneously with his announcement to run for president. In reading about how the Internet was key for Obama, BBC News reporter Steve Schifferes put it best:

“It (the Internet) has been particularly important for the Obama campaign, which was started from scratch with few resources and little name recognition. The Internet favours the outsider and gives them the ability to quickly mobilise supporters and money online.”

Society is full of people who feel as if they do not fit in, especially younger individuals when it comes to politics. We have used the Internet for so many other outlets to socialize, it only makes sense for us to take our social selves online to explore something as important as deciding our next leader. We have become comfortable socializing online with others as well as discussing important issues in our lives. Certainly politics ranks in those issues.

Throughout campaigns there is always some kind of reference made to how little younger Americans participate in politics much less vote. Honestly, when I turned 18 I took it as a great honor to be able to vote and voice my opinion in who I think should run our country. Sadly, I do not believe many of my peers felt the same nor do the youth of today. Or at least they didn’t. Now different avenues have opened for them to search out more information about politics. They can find a place in the political world, one that before they felt a bit out of place.

As America progresses along with technology, the political world needs to keep in mind that youngsters really are interested. Politics simply has to be made available to them in a way that they want to interact and participate with it. Americans 25 years and younger are currently (and will be going forth) wired. News and information must be placed at their fingertips in a format that interests them and available when they want it. They want Democracy 2.0. The following is a video of youth voices in just what Democracy 2.0 is and how much of a need for it there is:



Obama’s campaign fit into Democracy 2.0. In addition to his website, you could also sign up to receive emails regarding campaign news or text messages announcing key moments in the campaign, such as the text that was sent when Obama choose his vice presidential running mate. Those interested in seeking out who this man was could easily find the information and could also easily keep tabs on any developments.
Moving into the overall political world, politicians and those interested in politics are learning that to gain the interest of the younger generations, new mediums must be used as well. YouTube was one of the first to unleash this power. Together with CNN, a series of televised debates were held in which the candidates fielded questions that were submitted through YouTube. The YouTube submissions were from typical Americans.

Another site I found interesting was 10questions.com. Launched on October 17, 2007, this site, as described by its FAQ section, is the first truly people-powered online presidential forum that seeks to involve millions of voters in prioritizing the questions they want answered. My understanding is that the questions are then voted on by other visitors to the site, the most popular of questions are then asked. Certainly this site is a step in the right direction. We are all involved as beings in the social network and given the opportunity to participate in politics on our own terms. Society thrives on being able to interact like that, now more than ever in this technological age. The following is a video about 10questions.com and the future of politics online:



I see the Internet and other technologies like texting and emails having a huge impact in the years to come in politics. I am guessing the campaign managers for Obama certainly wouldn’t disagree.

Finding a Voice

I am probably one of the biggest advocates for being able to develop social skills using a more online environment and other means of interacting that step away from face to face interaction. While we certainly need to learn how to socialize across both platforms, those not comfortable with face to face can find a voice, which will likely lead to easier time communicating face to face through exploring other mediums. For starters, everyone, no matter what age, will feel more at ease expressing oneself. Overall it will open up many new possibilities for education. How we learn and building upon what we learn will be key. The many mediums we now have access too will also allow for more learning. And all of it will spill into the classroom where students will be able to more effectively communicate with instructors since they have already developed the skills of communicating with adults online.

I’ve touched lightly before on the huge benefits to children in allowing them to learn responsibility online. As we dove deeper into Henry Jenkins’ Convergence Culture this week, my eyes were opened to a whole new realm of how the digital age can help the children of today in the art of learning. This method of learning though stepped away from the typical pedagogy ways of “old school.” Through digital media, an entire new world in which we can learn (and teach) has been created. Certainly, this is a crucial part of socialization, from how we can learn to ways this new way of learning encompasses socializing.


I found this video on YouTube that I feel perfectly describes the many, many ways we learn in the 21st century. It was of particular interest as it showed how we learn in both the digital and print world as well as in the classroom. To me, all the ways we learn come together and build on one another.



Upon starting Jenkins’ chapter “Why Heather Can Write,” I doubted yet another influence of the Harry Potter mania that has drawn so many. I’m not a fan (sorry, Dr. Platt), and I couldn’t even tell you the title of one of the books. However, I kept an open mind. Loving English and Shakespeare and all the other “yucks” of high school/college English courses, I’ve never really “gotten” how everyone else cannot feel the same much less dislike it so much. But in this Jenkins’ chapter it all clicked. Hamlet is a passion to me like Harry Potter is to others. If an individual is engaged in reading and writing willingly, does it really matter if it’s Shakespeare or Rowling that provokes it?



This takes us to the social side. I know for me, unfortunately, there weren’t a lot of people I could converse with when I was growing up about writing or reading and certainly not Romeo & Juliet. I can’t imagine having an outlet like “The Daily Prophet” or “The Sugar Quill!” As Zsenya, the webmaster of “The Sugar Quill” was quoted in Jenkin’s:

I think it’s really actually an amazing way to communicate... The absence of face to face equalizes everyone a little bit, so it gives the younger members a chance to talk with adults without perhaps some of the intimidation they may feel in talking to adults. And in the other direction, I think it helps the adults remember what it was like to be at a certain age or in a certain place in life.

Once children and younger adults are more comfortable with communicating with adults, a shift will be seen in the classroom. A student, who has been receiving coaching and feedback from an adults online, will find it much easier to communicate face to face with instructors. More questions will be asked by the student and the student will also be more open and accepting of feedback.

Returning to Jenkins, a paragraph later, he discusses the term scaffolding. This is how new skills build on those mastered. I think it is important to note how much is being built. While the creative juices are flowing and these individuals are becoming better writers and thinkers, they are also building the foundation of how to communicate properly in society. Not only are they learning how feedback is a gift with others critiquing their work, but also how to communicate at different levels from the level of peers to those that are older. One of the best ways to learn social skills is by watching and mimicking those who have already (or are close to) mastered them. This is one of the best ways we learn. I can’t help but to think of James Gee and his idea community of practice:

Within a community of practice all members pick up a variety of tacit and taken-for-granted values, norms, cultural models, and narratives as part of their socialization into the practice and their ongoing immersion in the practice. Tacitly accepting these values, norms, cultural models, and narratives (in mind, action, and embodied practice), and sharing them with others, is just what it means to be a member of the community of practice. This, by and large, solves the problem of critique.

Sure, Gee proposed this in 1987 and more for the purpose of teaching, but I can’t help to think that it was glimpse into the future. To me, it perfectly summarizes what we must move toward as well as try to incorporate it into the web world, many outlets to grow our different social skill sets.

Meet Me at the Water Cooler… Online?

No, it isn’t the name of a new networking site. I am instead referring to how we have moved from an age of how we used to gather around the water cooler as Jenkins liked to refer to it, to having this social setting online now. Certainly, the water cooler conversations haven’t come to an end, but now if no one in your work circle seems to pay attention to a show on television like you do, you now have another outlet, or should I say outlets? We have constantly been evolving in the forums we use to social, moving from the public baths of the Roman times to city hall to the water cooler and now to the World Wide Web. It is easy to access this means to network and discuss, and there are plenty of outlets to do so as well, blogs, message boards and of course, Facebook. With that said, the water cooler is now online.

I don’t know why, but I find this shift in how we socialize amazing. Certainly we’ve come a long way since the Romans. And I do wonder, what part of how we social now, will become as outdated as talking in a giant tub? While I am not saying the online network of socializing will be leaving us any time soon, I do wonder what it will make obsolete in the world of socializing? I know. A question for another time.

I am bored out of my mind at work today, so I decided to search the term “online socializing” since I am struggling with this blog post. Of course, I’d happen to come across what I think is something humorous, a YouTube video about online socializing. Of course, I am at work at can’t watch it thanks to being Websensed. You know how I blogged earlier about having restrictions and this being bad for children being able to grow and be responsible on the web? Well, being Websensed at work sure makes me know how a child whose parents monitor his/her every move online feels. Back to the video. I have no idea what it is about, and perhaps it is really helpful. I have to admit that the first thought I had was that it’s going to be about how to socialize online. Now, this is perhaps a really good idea. And after further Goggling, I even found a college course dedicated to studying online socializing.

This takes me back to the shift in us socializing more and more online. While I certainly don’t think we need to be taught on how to socialize online, I revisit a subject touched upon earlier – researching it! Now watch, I’ll go home and watch that YouTube video and think some education about socializing online is needed. But really, were we taught how to socialize face to face? Not really. Our parents made sure we had a social network available to us and we continue to keep routes to that network open, but no one is really teaching anyone about it. The Romans simply started it in the public baths. And those after simply evolved it (thank goodness!).

I realize this blog has been everywhere almost since the water cooler. My point in the end is that new forms of media are positives to how we communicate with one another. Quite personally, I am somewhat glad to be able to log on and discuss a TV show online instead of at work. At work, you always have that chance that the co-workers you are talking with will bring up something else… something you didn’t exactly want to hear about. When you are online in a discussion board or maybe even in a chat, if you don’t like something said or the topic, you leave! No offense to anyone.

A Positive Spin

When I first considered what to look deeper at this semester choosing to look at new media effecting socializing, I have to admit that I was more of a proponent of it, thinking new media would be more detrimental to our social being. Last week we touched on cyber bulling. Now certainly this would be evidence to fuel my argument on the negative side. While it certainly is a huge issue along with all that surrounds it, I saw a positive light out of it. We familiarized ourselves with the story of Megan Meier and how she met and made a good friend online. While this turned out in the worst possible way it could in that the “friend” was a hoax, it made me see how social networking online can be very positive for many pre-teens and teens to develop friends. Megan had trouble it seemed making friends in school and in her neighborhood. Like many teens, she faced all kinds of pressures, one mostly of not fitting. However, online she did. She met a boy and likely strengthened her socialization skills in conversing with him and getting to know him along with respecting herself more. I think it is important to put the bad outcome of this aside and look as to how socializing online can be a huge plus for all of us today. As this blog listed on the New York Times under Health shows , it's safer than we think and actually, quite beneficial for acquiring social skills.

I know I personally was a bit shier in high school than perhaps most. And I won’t deny it. I am very anti-social today. Ask my husband. I am not crazy about going out or being around crowds and prefer to sticking to a close circle of friends that I’ll actually go out with to dinner or a movie. However, I love being online and chatting with friends and emailing. And I question if I would have had that outlet growing up, how different would I be? Would my shyness have been minimal? Questions I’ll never be able to answer. I know today though with the world of chat and email and being online, I am a lot more outspoken than I would have ever dreamed of being in high school.

This seemed to be the same for Megan. She was her true self online, confident, respected, fun-loving and outgoing. I think if we would have viewed Megan in a face to face social environment, she would have been quite different. I know I am. And I think a lot of people are. I took an online course last spring and almost instantly you could tell a difference. A majority of the students I felt spoke their mind and were quite active in participating on the discussion boards. We more easily left comments for one another. The comments were still respectful and everyone was kind to one another, but when you read some of the posts, you could easily sense that had this been in an actual face to face class setting, a lot would have went as not being said.

I think we can even see this in our online classes for this class through online chat. Ours have gotten a bit out of hand at times, and when you think of that, you know those things would never be said in class. Even so, the discussion moves a lot quicker and more input is given from all members of the class when we are in the chat setting.

In these two examples, I think it is safe to say that individuals, may it be a teen or college student or professional, communicate easier online. We can speak out and express ourselves in a way I doubt any of us ever thought possible. We are more comfortable in our skins and confident in our thoughts. We respect ourselves more as well as those around us in the online world (for the most part). Check out this video about the idea behind an online learning community. It really spoke to me about the importance of being able to socialize now online in addition to the “real” world.



Having the ability to communicate more online has opened up a whole new world, one especially beneficial to all us shy ones of society. So while I started this blog more set in how online communication would be bad for us in learning to socialize and nurture our social skills, I can now say I’ll argue against that. I’ve been a supporter of it for years and simply never realized it or how it was helping my own quest in being more social. In closing, I found a video done by an individual who I think has flourished in the online world. It is a bit long, but I think his message really wraps this up in how it is easier to socialize online.

A Right to Some Privacy, Please

Children of today need to learn how to explore and use the web. With parents monitoring every step children try to take online, they will not learn those skills. I understand the need to protect children, but we cannot completely take away their right to privacy. Parents and children will trust each other more if there are means to openly communicating. Children will learn how to be responsible online and learn how to socialize online, two attributes that will prove to be very important in the digital age.

Growing up, I am sure we all heard a similar phrase from our parents when they said no to something we wanted or did something we didn’t think was fair – “Wait until you have your own kids someday.” Well, I don’t plan on ever having children other than the four legged furry kind; however, being older now, I think I do appreciate some of the decisions they did make. I feel I also look at life now more with a parental eye.

However, upon reading the last chapter of Pavlik in which online monitoring software was discussed, I have to say I was disgusted. I certainly agree that there should be restrictions for children exploring the web but this completely invades their privacy. I know what you are thinking. How does this fit with it affecting how we socialize? Well, I feel that a constant monitoring of a child’s browsing online is harmful to him/her in learning the social skill of decision making. Parents simply cannot hold a child’s hand the entire time he/she is growing up. Think of the disaster that is bound to happen when that child ventures off to college or into life… alone… without any monitoring software.

I wasn’t sure if maybe my want to not be a parent did influence my support for some privacy for kids, but then I came across a show that had aired on Lifetime. Just a quick read of the synopsis showed me that I am correct in my thinking that allowing freedom online is good and that children are learning important social skills. You can read the synopsis here or watch a quick video on the importance of online socializing for children.

As I mentioned with television and parents making use of the V-chip, a similar scenario approaches us in this case. Parents by all means should control which sites a child visits online as well as what the child lists online on a site such as MySpace. I feel there are good options available for this type of control, such as parents being able to restrict sites as well as parents approving what a child may post for personal information on a page displayed publicly. To me, this will teach a child trust. The parents trust in the child in him or her not visiting sites a parent doesn’t approve of or posting information a parent has stated is not appropriate. The child will also trust the parents and feel the parents are protecting him, yet giving him the opportunity to prove he is responsible. I stumbled across this article posted online by CBS. It spoke on the tips and myths of keeping children safe online. My favorite tidbit from it was a paragraph close to the end that was certainly targeting monitoring software or programs:

Which all leads to the fact that - regardless of what technology parents try to employ, the best filter is the one that runs in the young person’s brain - not on a computer.

For me, having some report sent to the parent or the parent being able to log on and “watch” what the child is doing online will tear the child down and not allow him/her to learn the skills needed to make decisions and well as whom to trust. I also feel it would be detrimental to the child as he/she will know the actions are being monitored. In being monitored, the child will not grow and learn how to socialize for themselves online. Every child will constantly be thinking, “well mom or dad are watching this or reading this, so I am not going to check it out or read it or write it,” even if it may not cause any alarm. Like the story above mentioned, children have brains. Let them use ‘um.
This is especially important for teens. Teens have a right to some privacy. Teens are by nature private individuals. Some software to monitor every action isn’t going to remedy this and will only make it worse. And believe me, while my parents were not overprotective (the Internet didn’t really exist in my teen years), being sheltered by growing up in the middle of nowhere as a child was enough “monitoring” for me. I didn’t turn out all that bad (at least I don’t think), but I probably tested the waters a little too much after starting college. Yeah, you know what I mean…

Editorial Note: A few days after writing this blog, a segment aired on WDAY in Fargo (channel six). After viewing it, I wanted to call the parent and say “Yes!” a parent who is participating with their children online instead of monitoring it on the spy level. The mom had joined Facebook and her children were very open to this as well as having her check in on their profiles from time to time. Her kids to some extent even thought it was pretty cool that Mom was on Facebook! I am not sure how long the video will be online, but click here to check it out!

Pollute Me TV

I am going to start by making a bold statement: TV can pollute our minds. It can control our lives. In general, it is quite evil. Think back to the last time a crisis happened in our nation. It was on the television, hour after hour after hour, which turned into days. Yes, we do have the right to be informed, and yes, I guess we can turn off the TV, but one can’t help it. It pulls you in. You have to keep watching it. I am sure we have all been there at least once in our lives.

I was almost pulled into it earlier this week with the huge drop of 777 points of the stock market. Having had a mom in the financial industry growing up, I started my 401k at the age of 20. At this point in my life, I have that vested at 100% into the stock market. Monday was not a good day for me. Luckily, I am at least 30 years from retirement. Once I realized that, my television got turned off. I can’t help but think of those though that lost huge amounts of money and sat and continuously watched the news reports on it. Didn’t I mention television can be evil?

Don’t get me wrong. I love my television, perhaps even more than the next person. When you have lived in North Dakota all your life, my first 18 years practically in the middle of nowhere (largest city, Aberdeen, SD – located 88 miles from where I grew up), television becomes a really good friend. And even in my return to college life, the TV is still one of my best friends, providing me the background noise I just seem to need to study and then sleep. So really, I think I am pretty neutral, if not even a bit more on the side of TV.

Speaking with my friend Jani the other morning, she stated how she set her aging father in front of the TV set as she ventured off to work. She promised she’d be back on her lunch break to check on him. Due to unforeseen circumstances within the last week, Jani is now in charge of her 80+ year old father until she is able to locate another nursing home that will accept him. As she described this to me, she said she felt like a parent, plopping her child in front of the television set to occupy him so she could get something done, letting him tune in to whatever TV land had to promote for the day.

Ironically, a few hours later, I sat down to read Pavlik. And he was throwing out percentages about television, one in particular of how many Americans use TV as their #1 means of obtaining the news. In both the conversation and Pavlik’s rant on ratings, I couldn’t help but think yes, we certainly are taking in the news on TV, but how much other content are we taking in as well, may it be through subliminal messages, advertising or concepts that we interpret in our own way?

Jani’s father is a grown man. Yet, she was concerned about what he was going to watch on television all day and what kind of ideas he would have and stories he would tell her when she got home. One day she recalled something he had seen that made him scared to be in a nursing home! “You are just going to drop me off there and never come see me again. I know. I saw it on TV!” is the statement he made to her. If an elderly man is deriving this out something he watched, what about the shows our children are seeing, or should I say the ideas our children get from these shows? Parental controls aren’t likely used in many homes in America, though I am a huge proponent of parents being more in tune with what their kids are watching. It cannot be helped sometimes, and there may even be a show that seems very appropriate, yet ideas can be formed from it that simply aren’t. Or a commercial during the show as sometimes those too aren’t exactly “kid-friendly.” Jani has yet to figure out just what it was her dad watched that one day. As she headed out the door that morning, she had no choice in what to do with him other than handing him the television remote. I am sure she spent her day hoping the same show wouldn’t be on again that day.